Yesterday my Stepdad kenneth Charles Davison passed away after several years of pain and the last year with Melanoma. He died peacefully with myself and my husband and hospice present. Afterwards we brought Mom over from the next door nursing home to say goodbye. That was as heartwrenching as his death.
We are all fine, my sons are here and made it just in time to say good bye- they are with mom today keeping her company. When they arrived and walked up to the bed to say hello, he wiggled 1 eyebrow for them. The hospice ladies said the hearing and recognition is the last to go. Within 3 hours of arriving after he was gone. Maybe since he knew they were on their way he waited? The hospice gal came in about 2:30 and asked if she could give him one last bath and I said sure! 15 minutes later they ran down the hall to get us and 8min later he was gone.Death of a loved one is never easy, but sitting with him and talking to him, thanking him for all the love he gave to mom, me and my family was more than I ever got with my own dad and gave me peace as well. I am truly blessed to have had him in my life.
My mom has been seeing her Daddy and Mother at the end of her bed. I am glad my kids are all with her to comfort and visit with her.
and I am going to add that the 2 funeral homes I have had to speak to yesterday and today have been RUDE and SARCASTIC and if it happens again I am going to let them have an earful!
Well, my step dad has been put on hospice and is back in the nursing home for his last days. Although I/we have known this would happen it took my breath away yesterday when I was holding his hand and sitting on the bed talking and he looked me in the eye and said " I am dying" and I had to say "yes, but no matter what -I love you". What do you say to that? I really had no words!
I didn't have the chance to do this with my own dad 19 years ago, and I have always regretted that, but now I am not so sure which is worse. Knowing or not knowing.
The doctor said if he doesnt start eating better (his throat hurts to swallow) he will have about 2 weeks, but she said she can't predict these things and we just need to keep him comfortable. I know the Hospice and the nursing home will do a fine job.
I feel as though my insides are being ripped out as my Mom is still in the hospital till at LEAST Monday or Tuesday or whenever the nursing home she will go to has a bed ready for her. She will also be on pallative care with Hospice. All they can do with her dementia is make her comfortable how ever long that will be. Her kidneys aren't working and they are having to cath her a few times a day to remove the urine. She was able to see him yesterday for an hour then she wanted to go back "home". (he was one floor above her in the hospital)
My sweet wonderful daughter Katie has been with them almost all the time giving Kay and I a reprieve. She took these photos yesterday.
Neither of them could say much and mom was as usual, not understandable, and it was heartbreaking to watch but the calm that came over them both was so apparent. I wish moms mind worked better so she could grasp the gravity of what is happening. There has never been a question for me that he has loved and cared for my mom and seeing this brief interaction yesterday only confirmed their love this last 16 years. It will tear me apart to have to tell her he is gone when it happens because I know she will give up. He has been a VERY good stepdad to me.
Your prayers of comfort for my parents would be greatly appreciated.
While I am sitting in the room with my mom asleep yesterday, my cell phone rings and it's the doctors office of the ENT surgeon where my stepdad was for an appointment. They were sending him to the Emergency room.
So now BOTH of my parents are in the hospital. I am grateful that 2 of Ken's sons will be here tomorrow to see him.
But, it's a mess- they are both a mess- he is physically ill and she is mentally ill.
and so it goes- please add our family to your prayers- just for peace and comfort. God is at work and has his plan and I have to just wait and endure and so do they.
My mom is talking about my Gramma (her mom) this week. Seeing her, talking to her but only in her dreams. I have no idea if there is a message there, but my mom is pretty clear that Gramma comes to see her. For that comfort for my mom I am truly grateful.
So last Thursday night my wonderful creative husband is cutting "rounds" for gnome steps on his table saw and he catches his right thumb and barked the knuckle on his right pointer finger in the blade.
We head to the ER as with all the blood we couldn't tell how deep the cut is.... and blessed as he is by a loving Father in Heaven, no stitches! But the cut is bad and sore and icky and they put him on Keflex antibiotic for 5 days and gave him a tetanus shot. And he is still really sore commenting frequently how he never knew how much his thumb is used!
We feel truly blessed he didnt lose any fingers or a hand.
And so my life continues............................ I hope your end of June goes out without any bang or accident!
And the good news is......... Katie was offered a job by the manager of PFI western store Saturday without even asking for one! She will be moving into her home on the 3rd but will only be 35 minutes away so we will get to see her more often than having her in Oregon! lol
I know that you come here for creative inspiration and for the last few months it has been seriously lacking. I cannot begin to tell you how draining it is with elderly parents and their health issues.
Today we have to go and pack my moms things at the nursing home, she will no longer be allowed to live there. She now has to be in a lock down facility. And we have to bring all her things home for now until she is in a new permanent place.
Have I mentioned how badly I HATE Dementia and what it has done, and is doing to my mom? And did you know that medically a "diagnosis" of Alzheimer's cannot be given until a person is DEAD and they do an autopsy?
What a Crock! And from the website definitions of the stages of Alzheimer's my mom is stage 6 out of 7! But they will only diagnose her with 'dementia'. We got that diagnosis 16 years ago! I am so frustrated!
My stepdad was in the Emergency room again yesterday but is now back at the nursing home. He is a mess physically while my mom is a mess mentally. I feel like all my creativity has been drained from my body and I find myself more and more in my yard and garden puttering. Gardening is good for my soul.
So please, please bear with me as I struggle through all of this. I just received an order of 8 brand new stamps and some designer paper from the new catalog and I will be playing this week and sharing here. I have another order going in this week for the Project Life items. I am thinking they look pretty fast and fun to create with!
Due to the holiday this week we will not have card class, all my stamping friends are gone! lol
We have a church Pancake Breakfast here on July 5th, 8-10am
It's free, so come over and visit with us! bring your lawn chairs!
I hope your weekend is wonderful. I am off to get moms stuff/see my stepdad and wish him happy birthday- hit Sam's Club for our monthly supplies as well as the pancake breakfast supplies and come home to crash! lol
I did get 21 quarts of green beans pressure canned this week and I am now teaching how to make jam and jelly in July for our Relief Society meeting. I have been making those since 1980 and I love it. Jam is good but not as good as homemade!
I am so very glad to be home although I came home unable to speak due to allergies/dry conditions. WHO would think that I would miss the humidity so much! lol
I hope to get rested and get back to work tomorrow, but I wanted to say HI and welcome 2 new Recruits to my team this week!
Hope you are having a wonderful week tty tomorrow~!
oh, Katie is home today to stay until she finishes her Masters degree in Ag Education! She will be here a few weeks and then will be moving in as a ranch manager on a cattle ranch and have her own house!
So very glad to be back. I need to get my photos off my phone and whip up a couple scrapbook pages to share using MDS!
Today my daughter Katie graduates from College at Blue Mountain Community College. She will have her associates in Ag Education and this weekend will be moving home to attend Missouri State University in the fall and get her Bachelors in Ag Education as she wants to become an Ag Teacher for highschool kids.
I want to thank publicly Chad Bybee and Jason Shriver for their counsel, support and encouragement to her in highschool and during her college time! You both have been the BEST teachers she could have ever had, and we thank you for all you have done to help her!
Next week I will be posting photos and the story from the Ceremony!
She was just sent to a psychatric hospital this morning for evaluation and when that is done she will not be going back to the nursing home but to a facility that can care for her problems.
Before her stroke she was angry just to be at the facility or if someone did something she didn't like- but since her stroke her anger (it affected the front right part of her brain that has the inhibition and good choices part in it- well she doesnt have either anymore ) she has become harmful to others in the nursing home and the staff. They have given her meds for it but they cannot keep her doped up all the time. She needs a different care now than they can give her and I am ok with all of this. I know they have her best interest at heart. I knew it was coming after her display when we took her out for dinner on Mother's Day.
This was not a surprise. I am glad to see her get the care she needs. The social worker that called me cried because she loves mom and hates to see this happen but she did admit she probably kept her there longer than she should have. and I want to publicly say that Brookhaven Nursing Home is AWESOME.
Ken will remain there and continue his radiation. He has always been good to me and taken care of my mom as best he could.