What a wonderful memory and story I have to share today.
You see, I married Kay in August of 2003, his first wife had passed away in 2001 from cancer. During our engagment, I was introduced to Kay's family and to Carolyn's family- you know the uneasiness of that and how akward one feels- (what will they think, I know I can never measure up, I hope they like me, how will I be treated..... etc...) Just some of the thoughts that went through my mind. Well, let me share with you my experience .
I met Kay's family that June of 03 in Utah at their family reunion. What fun! What a loving welcoming non judgemental extended family he has! His parents, his siblings and their spouses and children welcomed me with open arms. And during this trip I was introduced to his first wife's family (with much trepadation on my part) I was welcomed into their lives with open arms, their family with love, NO judgement, only happiness and warm welcoming hugs and words.
With that said, here is my story: Lloyd, or as Kay calls him Pop, was the first person that I met from the maternal side of this family. His wife Lorraine and he were at their home and Kay stopped in for a visit. I was unsure what to call him so I called him Mr. Schlappi and immediately was told that would not do, that I was to call him "dad". I was surprised and pleased, and he made quite a fuss about it so I said, ok. Kay and I were married and our reception in Boise was wonderful with family and friends and Mr Schlappi (my misake calling him that), I was once again admonished that It was "DAD" while I was being given a wonderful hug and kiss on the cheek. About 2 weeks later he called, I knew it was him because of his disctictive voice when I answered the phone. Here is the conversation quoted from my journal... "hello?, Hello! Do you know who this is? (pause on my part) "HI DAD" I said, "That is correct and dont you EVER forget it ok?, Ok I won't." and then we continued with the rest of our chat and the phone went around the table to the kids. I am truly blessed that he wanted me to call him such an endearing name, and with all the visits and phone calls over the last 6 years, I was always treated respectfully, loved and hugged and cared about and I cannot tell you how blessed I feel because he was so wonderful to me and didn't compare or judge me with his daughter.
This weekend we celebrate his life and altho it is a sad occasion, it is also a joyous one because families come together to remember special people and share time together (and we get to see the kids and grandkids- well most of them anyhow). I just wanted to share my love and gratitude for someone so special, someone who took me into his arms, his heart and his family and to thank Carolyn's brothers and their wives and families for doing the same.
Kay, Dad and Kasey
Me, Dad and Kasey
These photos and many more were taken last June of 2008. I will treasure each kind word, expression of joy for our happiness in our marriage and each question he asked about me, my family, my life and how I was getting along in the new family. He of all people understood losing a spouse and remarrying and the blessings it brings. It was surely wonderful to have him in my corner (as he put it).
Thanks for letting me share, somehow sharing wonderful memories helps to take away part of the pain and help us grieve and as we share our apprecation and love for special people we love.